Getting married: bureaucracy or?

After proposing to Mrs MyWarsawDream (and her saying the magic word), the fun started. After searching online on what would need to be arranged to marry each other in our situation, I was about to throw my laptop out of the window.

How come? 

First of all the websites of the official instances are not very clear. Asking for clarity on expats groups on Facebook was not a very wise decision either. The proces is such a pain in the arse that people tend to forget half after being in that same position, or they have a memory which is just not right ("Oh that was easy", synonym for: my fiancee arranged the stamp by writing, calling, going to three different places, returning to the first one).

You might get the feeling that I am exaggerating a bit here, but lets sum it all up and you decide, OK?

Our situation
Dutch man (residing in the Netherlands), Polish woman (residing in Poland), want to get married. Not in church, but let me come back to that later.

First of all, let me sum up the requirements for a marriage of two EU citizens from different EU member countries, with both countries having their own demands.

The above gives you an idea I think, here we go. 

For the Dutch authorities;

- Act of birth of myself (NL)

- Civil status of my fiancee (PL)

- Sworn translation of civil status (PL to NL)

- Registration of my fiancee in Warsaw (PL)

- Sworn translation of registration (PL to NL)

- Copy passport (PL)

- Act of birth of my fiancee (PL)

- Sworn translation of act of birth (PL to NL)

The Netherlands

After a visit at town hall in the Netherlands they granted me a document which confirmed that I was eligible to marry.

Back to Poland 

In Warsaw we could now go and request marriage, taking the following documents with us. 

- Act of birth of myself (NL)

- Sworn translation act of birth (NL to PL)

- Eligibility to marry (NL)

- Sworn translation eligibility (NL to PL)

- Passport (NL)

- Act of birth of my fiancee (PL)

- ID card of my fiancee (PL)

This all might seem like a quick mention, but it was a struggle. We had to go to so many different governmental buildings that I have lost count. Also we did not realize that we would need so many sworn translations. Many documents were old and were not an international version. And if I recall correctly we even had some international versions translated to Polish.

Ratusz Arsenał

The most frustrating was the moment when one of my documents did not get approved by the civil servant in Warsaw. It was close to metro Ratusz Arsenał. In the Netherlands it is common to use a small word in an act of birth before the place of birth. The word, "te". Like "te Neede" or "te Amsterdam" (in Neede, in Amsterdam). We had the whole bloody document translated inclusive of two stamps, but it was rejected. 

They told us to have it corrected and also we would need to bring a translator in person this time. We were stunned, was this woman taking a piss out of us? Apparently it was mandatory to have a third person with you if one of the lovebirds does not understand Polish. 

I can remember that we were upset by all this. Why a third person? We spoke English to each other the whole damn day! We then switched the button and contacted the translation company again. It had to happen fast as we needed to have this sorted. Suck it up and move on! 

Ratusz Arsenał part 2

The second try was also a tad nerve wrecking. We now had the corrected translation with us and were waiting for our translator. And waited. And waited. Until my fiancee really had to go to work...

And the third try...

Like they say, the third try is a charm. Well, not in our case. We had the corrected document, a translator (cousin of my fiancee), what was wrong now?! 

The issue was that a document of Marital Status is only valid for 6 months, with our desired date of marrying was not available anymore. Our alternative preference was September 16th, but the document of marital status was expiring right before that date.

We had to sign that we would bring a revised document with a new date stamp within 14 days, otherwise no marriage on the 16th of September. 

So there I went again, to the Netherlands to obtain a brand new original with a new date stamp,  they did not accept copies and the Civil servant in the Netherlands required me to come pick it up in person. 

🇵🇱🛫🛬🇳🇱📃🕺🛫🛬🇵🇱

Then we had it translated again, which also requires some days. Meanwhile the clock was ticking, the 14 day deadline was getting closer. 

Then we received a message that the translation was ready, my fiancee dashed to the office to pick it up and went to the city office right after. 

What a relief after bringing it to that city office.  We were so happy, had our wedding ceremony planned on a dream location, in Warsaw's Old Town. Stamped and sorted! 

Permits 

Now that we had the day and time, we had to go to another city office in Old Town, to request a permit for the wedding car, to be able to drive through Old Town and park it for some time. After some time we could pick up two permits. Stamped and sorted!

  

Ceremony 

For the ceremony we also needed to hire a sworn translator for me and my father, who was my witness. She would translate every Polish sentence to Dutch, I could answer in Dutch and she would translate back to the person marrying us. Booked and sorted!  

Next was arranging the location where we would go to after the ceremony, write invitations, bring them in person, plan flights and arrange accommodation for our Dutch guests, etcetera. But that was peanuts compared to our previous adventures. 

Marrying in church would add another level of complexity. I am glad we did not, as I would have gone ab-so-lute-ly nuts by then. One of my classmater had to get re-baptized as the priest did not recognize the one which he underwent in his home country as a child.

But now back to our ceremony...

Drums please

We were happy to sign one more document!

This whole history made us feel so relieved that I nearly swallowed my wife, I can still remember clearly what was going through my head. Something like: "Fuck it all I will kiss you like there is no tomorrow."

WE DID IT!

Well, almost
And one more at the city office in our district (there's always one more) to register the marriage.

I just noticed that it does not even have a couple of stamps on it. Finally, an international document without stamps! They saved the best for last I guess...

And again to the Netherlands

I made an appointment at town hall in the Netherlands, booked a flight, went a couple days after, took the declaration of marriage and had ourselves registered as a married couple in the Netherlands. I was back in Warsaw the day after. 

Bureaucracy?
My Polish teacher spoke the following words after listening to my story:
"They just wanted to make sure that you really loved each other."

Photo by Fox_graf©

She was right.